| Review of Teen Dirt Bags:
I didn't take a shower today. I know, everybody in unison is like "ewwww!" But let me explain. It's Sunday. It's boring. I have nothing to do, and nobody to see. So who am I going to really impress? The cats? As long as I have food and a place for them to shit, they are complacent. But I also have a further explanation. I showered last night. And I know most people prefer to do their showering in the morning, I like taking one right before bed. So I am still relatively neat and clean. And it was late at night, like around one a.m. So maybe I am not a dirtbag. But let me tell you who is, and thats teenagers. Especially the filthy ones who don't shower regularly. That is the first thing I thought of when I saw the site Teen Dirtbags. Let's see how true that theory holds!
Teen Dirtbags is a site with a theme of teenage girls. Now you might wonder what the dirtbag thing is all about. Well, their explanation is pretty much that these girls are filthy in the sexual way. The girls you are watching are all showered and cleaned! I'm not sure if there is a big market for actual dirtbag porn, with hairy girls who are all greasy and nasty. Hmm, I wonder if there is any money in that. Even if there is, I'm not touching that one with a ten foot pole. Anyways, this is basically a teen site with a catchy name. It will make you remember it, and it made me want to review it, so kudos to whoever came up with it, because it really does have a catch to it!
When you first sign into Teen Dirtbags, you are given a site that is a little messy, but overall it's not terrible. The biggest problem with the site is the bottom half of the site, which is dedicated to ads. That stuff doesn't belong on any pay site, trial or no trial. Otherwise, for a change on this network the thumbnails and previews really aren't half bad. Anything you go to here will take you to the site content page, so theres really no use in navigating the front page much. But still, it's not terrible. There are some toolbars that take you to leased sites as well. All in all there really isn't a whole lot of stuff you can do here. It serves more as a portal, but all in all, it's messy but not total crap!
The videos here on Teen Dirtbags are much like the rest of the network. There aren't quite as many segments here. The segment numbers are still pretty damn high, they can go from 11 to 14. But thats not quite as high as you get elsewhere on the network. It's still way too many and a royal pain in the butt, but it's not as bad as it could be (which we've seen elsewhere on the network!) Another annoyance is that there is only one quality and type of video. These are WMVs. There are no full video options or anything. The videos are pretty small file wise, but thats even more of a reason to have less segments. Overall, this is just a cavalcade of disappointment, but it can be remedied if the videos are good.
The video quality here is pretty weak. The videos are only 464k, which is the lower side of a medium quality. And it shows it. You will not want to full screen these videos, because it is rather ugly. It's just exactly what I said it is; medium quality. Anyone who looks on the net for videos will be rather disappointed. The actual movies are shot and look like real video pornos, there is a reason behind that we will get into later. But for now we'll just say that the quality doesn't stand up to the standards set by the leading video sites on the net.
So it's picture time. The pictures here are vidcaps. And they are taken relatively well. If I didn't know that this was unexclusive material, I might have been fooled. There is some pixelation in some shots, but other ones end up pretty clear. So I have to say kudos for that, I am not a vidcap fan at all, but here it works out okay.
So now it's time to discuss the big "o", and thats originality. Or the big "e", exclusiveness. This site is neither. Any seasoned porn veteran has seen these videos around the net before. Is that a bad thing? Well, I tend to say no to that because this network does have some redeeming sites you can see (Adult Associate is not listed in the bonuses, but if you sign up through there you can get all of these sites). And I'll be frank with you, this isn't a good site for porn veterans. But if you are coming in and this is one of the first sites you've joined up with, hey, this can be pretty fucking good. Why? Well, because first of all there is a decent trial. Second of all, theres a TON of leased links, and if you are new, those will keep you occupied for HOURS on end. And plus you can download some cool videos. And there is quite a few of them.
At the time of review, and probably forever here, there was a total of 34 sets of content. That is a pretty nice number, maybe not so considering the unexclusiveness, but it's still a decent amount of porn! There is also a pretty big network here, and we will discuss that now!
Those bonus sites include: Cream Filled Holes, Anal Sex Lessons, Cash Strapped Teens, College Fuck Tour, Cum Swallowing Lessons, Cum Swapping Bitches, Gangbang Lessons, Handjob Lessons, Huge Dicks Little Chicks, His First Threesome, Lesbian Lessons, Milf Riders, Moms Need Cash, and White Pussy Black Cocks. Nice amount of bonus sites here, some of them are a pain to download from but the sheer number just simply cannot be ignored!
Conclusion
This is not a good site, but throwing down for a trial can net you some decent porn mixed in with a lot of headaches, network wise. And for this site, I think it's a great site for beginners. Not only will you get a TON of stuff you've never seen before, you will also get the knowledge of what to look for when you sign up for a site like this. It can be very appealing, but only if you don't know what else is out there. But for us veterans, it's basically a throwaway site on an "eh" network.
Pricing
$4.87 For 3 Days Trial
$39.73 For 30 Days Membership
Billing by CC Bill
2005-08-26
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