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Pictures: Yes Bonus sites: Yes Downloads: Yes
Movies: Yes Live Shows: No Formats: wmv, flash

Review of Porn Pros:

Wow where did the time go?... Anyways enough with the cheerful reunion let’s talk about some new porn (nothing better right?!).


I’m saving up for a big batch this time as I am going through an array of sites that when combined make up the pornpros.com network. If a name can indeed obligate a site to know what they are doing this would be one of them. Knowing and remembering their two flagship sites 18yearsold.com and freaksofcock.com I was more than anxious to join up for a full month, signup was without complications and I was cruising all of the sites within 3-4 minutes.

What surprised me the most was how quickly this network has been beefed up to 9 exclusive niche sites in the hardcore category. I guess when you get a hit in porn you’re now slow to slap the shit out of those cash cows. I keep my own bat handy just in case of emergencies like that ;).

Just to be clear though, there is not really any new thinking to any of these sites they have all been done almost the exact same way by a lot of other porn networks. Two sites spring to mind though when it comes to thinking a little outside the box: Sleep Creep and Real Ex-Girlfriends. The first one focusing on girls sleeping that get sneak-fucked (new term, don’t look it up) by their boyfriends, either that or it’s just plain rape I guess. The second being more amateurish where guys are encouraged to send in sleazy footage of them and/or their ex-girlfriends as sort of a “payback’s a bitch ain’t it?!”. Both of these were very fun to watch and sported some very hot girls in the mix.


When we look at the network as whole the common denominator is 18-19 year olds. It’s obvious that their members are expecting these girls in any site they launch and so they make sure not to disappoint. I’m all for girls in their prime but you have to watch out for the catch, small tits. That’s right I said it, 18+ sites have the added of hazard of small tits galore. Now I’ve come to be so “distinguished” that I simply will not put up with watching a surfing board get fucked over and over again. The last thing you want to ask a girl for before fucking is DNA evidence of gender.

I sure made a big stink about that huh? Well the truth is that the “pros” here seem to be well aware of what the majority of porn surfers want to be looking at and so they mainly steer clear of this hazard. Actually if I had a boob-o-meter on my site I would rate this one a solid 7/10. Why not 10? Well there are a few flatties and too many jobs to justify such an enormous score on the well respected boob-o-meter (man I gotta implement that shit!).


Switching gears completely I want to talk about quantity for a while. Now since we are reviewing an entire network as one here there’s no danger of running out of new porn for the first 1-2 months… at all. Still some sites have been around for a while longer and so they can offer as much as 150 exclusive episodes per site whereas some are brand new and can only dish out 11. I’ll be adding more details for each site as I run through them but expect an average of around 30 per site and you will not be disappointed.


The movies around the sites are all gonzo porn but funny approaches pop in many of the clips with strange situations, toys etc. so there’s a lot of fun and new ideas combined with hardcore porn which makes it all a bit fresher than your average porn sites plus it’s really high class girls and producing, kudos on that end I really enjoyed the movies here and there were plenty of really great ones to go around.

Having said such kind words I am bound my porn-reviewing oath to also make a mention of the extreme amount of advertising you have to endure when browsing the fucking members area. The first time I logged in, after having paid for a full month, I was greeted by huge fucking layover advertising page that they wanted me to throw even more money after like I was simply abusing my dad’s Visa. To top off the ad-extravaganza, every and I do mean every single page on every site in the network has at least to ads showing at any time. I know this is a pet peeve of mine but I just don’t want the sites to keep begging for more of my money when I’ve already given them a monthly subscription. The reason why I hate it so much is because you cannot avoid accidentally hitting the wrong thumbnail at one point and that can get a lot of people in to more trouble than they ever wanted.


I’ve decided to end this review with a little pros (you get it? PROS!) and cons list so enjoy:

+ A shitload of porn
+ Great looking girls
+ New and fun ideas
+ A lot of different models
+ High Res photos
+ Daily updates

- Navigation and layout
- Lot of ads
- Low quality of the streaming videos
- Download speed varied a lot
- No DRM (who the fuck uses that anymore anyways)


The bottom line
This network is worth every penny but you will have to let some shit slide.

Pricing:
1 day: $0.95
30 days recurring: $24.95
90 day recurring: $59.95

Billing by LocalBilling

2008-09-08

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